What is to court a woman?

When a man courts a woman, what is it, and what should it be?

You may recall your own experiences here, and I hope you agree that the worst thing that can be called “courting” is the uncovered, dumb, straightforward desire to get a woman into bed. And in the best case, courting is to long for her in a more subtle, less explicit way. What these courting styles have in common is that they express a longing. Now such a feeling is natural to have and not evil per se … nevertheless, it is egoistic if not complemented by love that wants to give.

Really, can anyone think a woman wants to be just longed for? Not rather, cared for, invited by her lover to come into a situation where she feels at home?

Note that this thought is inspired by observations: there are men, longing for a woman, perhaps getting one … but unable to live a love relationship with her as they never learned that their woman cannot be just the object to fulfill their longing.

Created: 2007-07-27 14:14
Last siginificant change: 2007-07-27 14:15